Jason Kenz Xmas Chortles - The Internet Experience! Lee Collett
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"Droitwich - The FINAL frontier ... These are the voyages of the Starship Chortles.
Its ongoing mission: To find strange new pubs; to get completely plastered;
to loon around like no one has done before ..."
(Text inspired by Warren 'Waz' Pilkington).

Xmas Chortles 2 - Special Edition DVD!

It's HERE at LAST!! After two years of re-editing the digitally remastered
turbo nutter bonkers DVD version of Xmas Chortles 2 is now available!!

(Click any of the pictures below for more details about the Special Edition DVD)

The new CGI title from the Xmas Chortles 2 DVD

Under Construction

Please note that this website is heavily under construction and this is an early preview of things to come. I've removed the background music which has meant I can activate some Mp3 audio links. You can now click on certain words to download an audio clip which you can play in your default Mp3 player. Don't worry if you liked the FeekZoid music, ALL the music that has been composed for the Chortles Saga can now be downloaded from this site. The finished site will contain many more downloadable goodies, tons more graphics (including lots of grabs from the new film), gallons of info about the Chortles projects (past, present and future) and other assorted crap, erm, I mean amazing stuff like that!

These sections are now operational:-

The History of Xmas Chortles
The Xmas Chortles Audio Tapes
Xmas Chortles - The Movie
Xmas Chortles 2 - The Movie (VHS)
Xmas Chortles 2 - Special DVD Edition!
The Xmas Chortles Video Game
The Top 30 Farts & Belches
The Music of Xmas Chortles

Libble slitch!! Welcome one and all to the official Xmas Chortles web site! If you are wondering what the blinking flip "Xmas Chortles" actually is then I'll explain. Xmas (pronounced "Ecksmas" and not "Christmas") Chortles is the name I have given to three audio tapes and two versions of a 90 minute movie produced by myself with the help of various other British weirdo's (namely, my friends!)

Fart Cloud Click HERE for the Top 30 Farts & Belches! Fart Cloud

The tapes and movie feature lots of oddness with me and my friends FREAKING out! There's LOADS of amusing moments including classic outbursts, flatulence (which is the same thing), harsh language, computer games being played, expensive equipment being shot and blown up, alcohol consumption and lots of other oddness. As we are now all responsible adults we have beeped out any naughty swear words that are featured in the files downloadable from this website. If you have a problem with that then **F(BEEEEP) OFF!**

SMAAAAAAASH!!  Windows 98 has crashed for the last time!!  'Kenz & Collett Repairs' will return in the second Xmas Chortles movie!

Please note that the tapes and movie don't have much to do with the jolly yuletide event known as Christmas. If you have surfed here expecting to find lots of gratuitous Santa pics then I'm afraid you won't find any ... Sorry.

Silly Sam the Odd Chap!
It's Silly Sam the Odd Chap
(The Xmas Chortles mascot!)

What you will find on this site is tons of info about the "Xmas Chortles" audio tapes and movies! There's lots of downloadable treats, info about the new Xmas Chortles 2 DVD, info about the people who appear on the tapes and in the film and lots of other goodies besides. If you are familiar with "Xmas Chortles" then there's some really great stuff for you here - If you aren't then you are probably sat there with a big question mark above your head ...

Collett looks disapprovingly at Cam after we smash a computer monitor all over his back yard!

In case you were wondering, your guide through this here Chortles(tm) website is none other than Jason 'Kenz' Mackenzie, creator of the "Xmas Chortles!" saga (who appears at great expense). This site was originally designed and produced by chortles chum Mat Recardo (who's work appears at great expense) with extra bits of design work and eye candy added by Binary Zone Interactive.

Mat 'I am the walrus' Recardo not only supplies all the CGI for the second Chortles movie but he also STARS in it too!

Please note that this web site has been certified *100% CLINICALLY STRANGE* by the entire population of the planet Jupiter. No potatoes were harmed during the making of this web site (although one was consumed - inadvertantly).

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Website updated and maintained by

Site first uploaded:- 21/11/1999.
Last updated:- 18/11/2005.